The Law and Economics of Lust, Love and Life

Ang Nasasakdal

I was browsing through my old stuff and I found this poem I wrote when I was a kid.
Ang creepy ko, talagang korte ang subject ng tula ko.

--------------------------
Kay ingay ng paligid mga salitang nanginginig
Pangungutya, pagkamuhi, galit para sa akin
Oo! Ako ang nasasakdal ang nasasakdal na binabalot ng dilim
Ang nasasakdal na kalaban ng mundo, mag-isa walang kasama
Nasaan sila, sila na inaasahan ko, pinagkakatiwalaan ko?
Wala, naglaho kasama ng taong aking pinaslang.
Nalibing sa impyerno!
Oras na! Oras na upang ipahayag ko sa mundo ang aking pighati,
Ang katotohanan, naging bulag silang lahat!
Mga stupida!

Natahimik ang lahat, walang ingay,
at dahil sa katahimikang Iyon ay napagtanto ko,
panalo ako.
ANG NASASAKDAL.

ALL I HAVE ARE CONCEPTS.

Ladies and gentlemen, these are the titles of the stories that I will (though i have no idea exactly when) write in the future. Drumroll please!!! [Chick Lit ito. OO]

Overweight, Overwait.

A balanced diet + a balanced lifestyle = a perfect life.
A pretty simple formula, but who says too much of everything is bad?

Serial dater

The wannabe writer's journey of finding that final victim who will eventually imprison her in the bliss that committed love has to offer.

The Romantic Cynic
A law student explores her attitude about relationships because she’s been like a pendulum, trying to find love but scaring love all at the same time.

Secrets of the Week (from POSTSECRET)

Global Espionage

"Not only must contractors protect sensitive information from global espionage, but corporate espionage has also become a concern,"
--Lieske (Wireless NewsFactor)

In a world where almost everything is “wired” (literally and figuratively), espionage has become one of the unavoidable repercussions. Simple spying has been very common that it’s quite possible that you’re near a hacker in certain occasions. It’s a very big concern because if there’s something that we should be worried about, it’s our security. It has been a question of human rights when criminals are arrested because their phones were tapped, but if someone’s phone is being tapped, when do you draw the line between it’s necessity and urgency and taking advantage of technology? I think in Global Espionage, it’s not only about warfare, it’s about intellectual property rights, even closed door facts which are not meant to be exposed. Just like “Stealth” or Invisibility attained by aircrafts, it’s a saddening fact that people had to invent such ways to spy and that we all have to protect ourselves from being unaware victim.

With technology comes great responsibility, there will always be opportunity costs to technological advances. I know that we have to live with that fact, but when is it time to say it’s enough?

Anong Say Nyo?

I was reading Jessica Zafra's blog about this guard she saw who's reading Science Fiction and I felt pride from the fact that I know of an exceptional security guard too. I've been wanting to write about him but it always slips through my cluttered mind. His name's Kuya Vince. He's my favorite guard from the UP School of Economics. Paano ko nasabi na "winner" sya?

1. He's one fashionista. He was once asked to judge this pseudo contest in my organization and I didnt really recognize him because he looked a-ok. He looked really fine. Fashionable long sleeves folded just like how Carson (from Queer Eye) would fold it, nice cut pants and a fashionable hat. Panalo!

2. He's fond of reading too. He reads The Economist, Time, and lots of other books. He answers the crossword puzzles of Inquirer and other BROADSHEETS. Di tabloid ito!

3. Once we asked him what was his favorite program when he was a kid and he nonchalantly blurted out, Sesame Street. Sosyal. Di daw talaga Batibot, Sesame Street.

4. One evening, we went back to the School of Economics and he was there fixing the radio to a station that he likes... voila... he was listening to classical music.

5. He has a friendster account.

My fave security guard ever: Kuya Vince (right)

There. I miss Kuya Vince. Haay.

An Imagined Reunion

Nagkaroon ng isang reunion na kinabibilingan ng ilan sa mga nagdaan na lalaki sa buhay ni Eunice. they're gathered around a bonfire which Eunice single-handedly made. Oo nasa boracay sila. Legal ang bonfire. Pero ang mas mainit na apoy ay di galing sa bonfire.

(Background Music: You're so Vain)

Eunice: Im so glad you guys came. I guess it just means we're all good friends now.

Moaner: So, I can I call you tonight and you'll listen to me moan? [Evil grin]

Eunice: Uhmm, ok but only because we're friends now. [sighs]

Freak: How come he gets to moan and I dont get to kiss you like Penelope Cruz in Vanilla Sky? [pouts]

Eunice: because you're not Brad Pitt.

Freak: But I can kiss like him.

Eunice: (tries to smile) You wish. I dont think so. Friends dont kiss Freak.

Bluey: Hey Angel, wanna watch a flick this weekend?

Eunice: You promise to not hug me and walang subuan na mangyayari? (taas kilay)

Angel: Subuan? Anong subuan ito.

Eunice: (rolls her eyes) ng popcorn. Ano ka ba, alam mo naman na i'm not into sex!

Angel: You're not?

Artsy: No wonder you didnt want me to take you home. (tampong pururot) Ang gentleman ko pa naman nun. Ano ba ang nangyari? We had a great night naman a?!

Angel: Take her home?

Eunice: Ihahatid nya ko. Not "take me home" take me home. Ano ba yan. And Artsy, you didnt call me agad. I thought you weren't interested.

Bestfriend: Best, E kung maging fuck buddies na lang tayo? Bestfriend naman kita e.

Eunice: E kung suntukin kita? I said it's ok to go find your fuck buddy but i didnt say I can be your fubu. I'm not into sex sabi e!

Freak: You're not? Noooooooooooooooo. (drama)

Moaner: How am i supposed to moan now that I know you're not into sex. (Nagdabog pa)

Eunice: It's also my problem?

Kiero: Well, well, well. It seems like there's a "kaguluhan" here.

Eunice: (laglag ang panga, laglag ang panty) Damn he still looks great. Oh, hi Kiero. How've you been?

Kiero: Never better. I became a better man when you decided to leave me.

Bluey: Me too.

Eunice: (fake laugh) Good. That's what I wanted. Shit.

Basketbolista: Wassup wassup guys?

Eunice: Maluwag parin ang damit mo.

Basketbolista: Patay na patay ka nga sakin e.

Eunice: I was insane at that time. Give me back my letter. At i didnt even invite you!

Basketbolista: You didnt, but he did. (turo kay TooGayToFuncion)

TooGay: Hi there sweetie. It's been a long time since we last bowled.

Eunice: Uhmm, because you were hanging out with your guys in Malate remember?

TooGay: Darling, we had good times. We had good times.

Eunice: Of course. We practically spent our days shopping.

Moaner: Hey, that turns me on.

Eunice: What?

Moaner: That thing you do.

Eunice: What did I do?

Moaner: Never mind.

Artsy: Nga pala, nagkakilala kami ni Vin.

Eunice: Vin? As in my Vin? That guy from CSB?

Artsy: Yeah. He died.

Eunice: Buti na lang di naging kami. Sabi ko na nga ba maaga mamamatay un kakaworkout e.

Artsy: Mala-Eddie Guerrero ba?

Eunice: Pucha, feeling ko bubugbugin ako in the future. Pero yummy. Kamukha nga ni Vin Diesel. Karerista pa.

Artsy: Magaling naman ako a.

Angel: Magaling?! Eunice?

Eunice: Duh Angel. Lumabas ka na ng seminaryo kaya wag ka na magpaka-moral jan. Magaling sya, magsulat, magdala ng conversation at magmartial arts.

Angel: Bakit ba kasi ganyan kayo magsalita?

Eunice: It's not us dear. It's the way you think.

Bluey and Kiero: Nagsalita.

Eunice: Excusez moi?

Kiero: Can I just say that I still dont get the way you think?

Eunice: ANd you never will.

Bluey: See? Ayan ka nanaman. Nagpapaka-vague.

Eunice: We're supposed to be having fun diba? Akala ko ba we're all friends na.

TooGay: And friends don't argue? Sweetie, you should know better.

Eunice: Fine fine.

Basketbolista: So, sino sa amin ang pinakaminahal mo? ehem...

Eunice: Wala.

Bestfriend: What do you mean wala?!

Eunice: I dont think I have loved anyone yet.

TooGay: Stir.

Moaner: I'm sure ako un. I know how to turn you on baby.

Bestfriend: Ako, I know and understand you.

Artsy: Ha? We had a few dates and they were all sooo fine.

Bluey: Nagsubuan tayo!

(tingin lahat)

Eunice: ng popcorn. (whispers)

Angel: You were crushing on me since gradeschool.

Freak: I know you love me. can read your mind.

Kiero: I am perfect. Need I say more?

TooGay: Please wag na ako. I'm not interested. The only reason why I came is because I know there will be a lot of men. DI mo ko binigo Eunice.

Eunice: Nobody loved me.

ALL: We did!

Eunice: I didnt feel it. Party's over. (buhos ng sand sa bonfire) I take it back. We're all not friends anymore.

Moan: So cant call and moan anymore?

Eunice: Fuck off.

Artsy: Hatid na kita.

Kiero: Not again. You're running away from me again. What's the matter with you?

Eunice: AAAAAAAAAH! This is a mistake. I dont want you guys to haunt me again. Ever.

TooGay: Ay nagkrung krung ang lola mo.

Eunice: Bakla.

TooGay: Low blow. Pero I like.

Eunice: ENOUGH! ENOUGH! ENOUGH!

(background music: Bang Bang from Kill Bill)
(naglabas ng baril, pinagbabaril lahat ng nasa-party)

Eunice: Now I can go party. Hay salamat. It's over. Hubad ng sarong to expose her skimpy bikini. Now I can go get me my man. (psycho laugh)

(Background Music: I'm Every Woman)

-----------------

Characters:

Eunice: ako un. oo ako.
Angel: gradeschool-highscool crush
Bluey: moviebuddy
Freak: the warlock
TooGay: kelangan pa ba ipaliwanag?
Basketbolista: The lucky guy whom i made the 8-page letter for
Artsy: talentadong bata
Moaner: Cutie boy next door / horny
Kiero: perfect guy [not my type]

Sophisticated? Predatory!

It always feels nice to bump into people whom you have grown up with. It's refreshing to look back at the times when all we had were dreams and our innocent minds were preoccupied by nothing but passion for that ambition. I want that kid in me again. I want that driven girl to emerge from the woman that I've transformed into.

Rhea Salim: ah ok...kaya mo yan!..ikaw pa?!.. you've grown into a sophisticated lady...
Nice: haha. salamat. naks! sophisticated? i dunno if that's the right word for me. more like predatory or uhmm, crazy.
Rhea Salim: just take it...it's more of a compliment...hehehe

I'm saying hi to Rhea, thanks for dropping by my blog and for the wonderful conversation today. It made my day. Apir! I hope we and the rest of the "choir" could get together sometime. Nakakamiss ang ating gradeschool days.

Announcements.

I am happy to announce that I have started to read the book. I am not gonna comment on it because I am afraid that I dont deserve to comment on it yet. Paulo Coelho is a writer that captures the beauty in life's idiosyncrasies. And I should stop talking because I might not be able to contain my excitement. The only reason why I'm posting this is because I'm just so happy that I'm not reading anything that's law school related. At least for the next two days. Then I shall start to review for the midterms. Unlike last sem, i refuse to cram.

Also, I am overwhelmed by my discovery that a lot of people watched Love Actually during the break. [duh, it's in Star Movies Euns!] I know I talked about the flick gazillions of times already but I will never get tired of writing about how it never fails to make my heart go, "All I want for christmas is you..." all the time. I am now predicting that in the next years, there will be a proliferation of Love Actually fanatics and it will eventually be immortalized and will rise to the level that was achieved by let's say... My Bestfriend's Wedding or Sleepless in Seattle or Somewhere in Time or uhmm... Casablanca. But I am also predicting that it will be the official love story of the Christmas season. Unlike the movies that I mentioned in the preceding sentence, (eww, it sounded like i was reciting an article in the civil code, haha) Love Actually will be watched not by singles and couples or any lovestruck person during Valentine's Day but during the Holidays. What did I accomplish in making such a prediction? Nothing. So?

Also, Bob Ong has a new book, Stainless Longganisa. Havent bought one but I'm quite sure that it's as hilarious if not more than hilarious than his past books. Let us support Philippine Literature. I'll write something about it in the near future. I got into a conversation with Ana about how unfortunate it is that not a lot of people support our local writers. The books are way cheaper (think UP Press) but never less brilliant.

Yeah, here's to our "wasted hearts"-- indeed, all of us have our crazy moments. But thankfully, like that character from Love, Actually, we also learn to say: "Enough." -Peej B.

To end my entry, let make one last announcement. I found another blog that's worth linking to. It's Somewhere I Have Never Travelled by Peej Bernardo. So if you guys aren't doin anything and you're tired of reading the exploits of your favorite budding anorexic, I recommend that you go to his blog. He's a better writer. Haha.

The Spirit of Christmas

This year, i learned not to look for the spirit of christmas. I came to realize that WE must make it happen. It mirrors what we do and what we feel as we celebrate life. The whole month, I whined about how I still cannot feel the Christmas Spirit amidst all the beautiful things that I'm surrounded with. It was a month-long quest for getting in the mood and finding the things that'll make me smile. All of a sudden, I found myself hating the fact that there are a lot of people shopping and that i am LITERALLY bumping into them, i even winced at the idea of people getting together talking about how Christmas makes everyone all giggly, considerate and well, happy. For a time, I wasnt convinced.

We must admit, Christmas is a big neon sign that reminds us of the things that we lack. We look around and see our inadequacies parading all over our faces. It's a holiday that's persistent and at times, annoying. You cannot tell people to bug off and cannot even find it in your heart to say that you want to be alone. You don't do that because even if THAT will make you feel better, you will receive looks of pity and well, of disgust. You are not supposed to be alone on Christmas Dat. Nah. That's too sad. Even if that's what you want. You are supposed to hug people, talk to them about the things you've accomplished so far (yeah, and it continues until the New Year) and open gifts which, chances are, not the gifts you expect (unless you gave everyone a wishlist and made it clear that you are not gonna accept anything outside your wishlist). Still, after all the gift-giving and the human warmth, you still know that you lack something.

Whether it's something tangible (i.e. iron curler) or intangible (i.e. human warmth), you know that Christmas makes you CRAVE. Maybe it's the true spirit of christmas, to CRAVE for something. After all, cravings aren't always on the negative side. Cravings may give rise to your wanting to become a better person, aiming to finally let go of the infatuation you've been nursing for that (INSERT APPROPRIATE ADJECTIVE) guy or looking at your least favorite professor in a different light or... just deciding that you've had enough sad moments and you want to be happy -- again -- just like before. That, my friends, is the true spirit of Christmas.

Or am I talking about the New Year? Now I'm confused.

Things Like These Definitely Make My Day....

Mikki [ang nagwagi, kahit nakapikit kayang kumapa... ng gitara, tingin palang ulam na]

L: Peter [yummy talaga, malapad ang shoulder, malakas... ang smash, eksakto... mag-park]
R: Justin [rakista, misteryoso, malalim... mag-isip]

L: Jeio [naghubad sa harapan ko, malakas... ang spike, minamani... ang Economics
R: Gino [escort sa debut ko, magaling... sumayaw, mabilis... mag-drive]