May Kulay na mga Pisngi

Romance can be exhilarating and passionate if you're willing to take a
chance. It's time to speak up about your needs. If the quality of your love
life isn't up to par, you need to enforce your own romantic policies.

Well, as a lot of people know by now, MJ and I took time a out and decided to go our separate ways. We're still friends but since the Final Exams are nearing, I needed human warmth and emotional connection, so the other night I decided to go on a blind date... with Mike Lo. We decided to start a relationship there and then. It was a spur of the moment thing, amidst the empty Fita. On March 21st we decided to be each other's "Muffin". It's a relationship with a prescriptive period of 2 months... This summer, since we will not be seeing much of each other, I told him that what's important is EMOTIONAL FIDELITY. Therefore, he can find his ANIMAL WARMTH in the mountains while I find my HUMAN WARMTH here in Manila. We're both secure in our feelings that we promised to think of each other even if we're with someone or "something" [in Mike's case, haha] else. It's a perfect scenario, an open relationship that's gonna be fun fun fun. So there.

Euns: Oo, halimbawa pag nasa sinehan ako, iisipin ko na lang na ikaw un katabi ko. Tapos sasabihin sakin nun guy, "Teka, SINO KA BA? Bakit ka nakikikain ng popcorn ko?!"

Ralph was trying to lure me into going back into a relationship with him after our "one day" stint by announcing that he could make me happy and that if i feel stressed, I should just text him.. to that i replied, "I'll be more stressed if I do that." But I want to thank him for the donut last night which was partly because his perverse needs were gratified. Like what I would always tell Patring and Mike, "I am ready to give way for TRUE LOVE". That's after I made Patring deliver a sweet note to my "muffin" whom i sometimes call "munchkin" just because they sound alike, literally sealed with a kiss. What a lovely relationship.

So there. I am officially "in a relationship", again.

So much for my mantra, "HEALING, LETTING GO and BAWAL MAGKAMALI" for the finals. haha

FINALS Na!

"you're my highlighter, you bring out the most important parts of me"

last night's blind date was a blast. haha

"ang pagpapanggap"

"my studyplace"

Need I say More?

---
from POSTSECRET

Letter of Love #8

Hey,

Should I cut my hair? A lot of people say that when people get a haircut,
it's a sign of deep depression and cutting one's hair is but a ceremony for new
beginnings. Frankly, I fear beginnings, I fear the feeling of not knowing what's
beyond my understanding. I fear beginnings because more often than not, they are
indicative of endings. I know that life is a mere conglomeration of cycles meant
to trap you in a whirlwind of experiences and that alone tires me. I want to be
still, I need you to be still with me.

I need you to keep me grounded just so I won't get caught in yet another
emotional rollercoaster that surely will make me nauseous. I am waiting for you
with great anticipation of finally being able to stop and be contented, at least
emotionally still.

I dream not of us but of life with you. If being still means being still
with you, that is what I want to do for the rest of my life. In the meantime,
let's not stop moving until be bump into each other in the most magical of
moments that will start our eternal stillness.

Continue moving my love... that's what I'm doing, moving towards you.

Masaya ka ba?

Masaya ka ba?

Minsan ay nakikita ko sa iyong mga mata

na pilit mong kinukubli ang kalungkutan

na unti-unting bumabago sa iyong pagkatao.

Kung minsan ay gusto kong akapin ka

upan iyong malaman na nandito ako, hindi

bilang isang estrangherong dumating

upang umalis muli kundi bilang isang

mahiyaing anino na handa kang alalayan

sa iyong mga laban. Marahil ay madalas mo

akong naapakan, di man sadya ay nalilimutan

mong alamin kung nakakayanan pa ng aking

nagkukumahog na puso ang mga pangyayaring

nagmula sa iyong di dumadaloy na luha.

Lumuluha din ako, di man ito maaninag

ay marahil nadadama mo ang pagdaloy nito

kasabay ng pagdamay ng mga ulap sa aking

nananaghoy na kaluluwa. Gusto kong makitang

mahina ka hindi upang masaktan ka kundi upang

mapawi ng aking mga labi ang iyong pagsuko

na marahil ay habambuhay mong itatanggi

sa mundong sa iyong gunita ay pinagtatawanan ka.

Masaya ka ba? Wag kang mangamba,

ang kasiyahan ay nalalapit na.

Hay PIL

posting from Joan's place. Just felt like blogging. No important thing to say except for... GUSTO KO NA NG CHURVA. hehe

Just Because I'm Lonely

*sighs
meet our official Starbucks cat, Cat.
while taking a yosi break at ground floor
kung sino man yang lovers na yan

Sabi ko nga.

Dear Eunice Zuleika,

Here is your single's love horoscopefor Tuesday, March
20:

Love may not be following your timeline now -- in fact, it may seem to be
taking its own sweet time. You know what they say: You can't hurry it. Relax.
It's much better to wait for the real thing.

In Fairness

Things eventually fall into their proper places. So I believe Carlo when he told me last Saturday na... "At the end of this sem, I have a feeling that your issues will finally be resolved. We don't know if it's gonna be in a good way or a bad way, pero feeling ko mare-resolve na yan,"

*keeping fingers crossed

Things are pretty stable again. [at the risk of being laughed at by fate again, I still am optimistic] Although there still are glitches, they're minimal as opposed to the beautiful things that are happening. I can't complain. Really.

I am sort of missing a lot of people... and sometimes I am strongly tempted to put everything in the open and just announce what I truly am feeling. But like all wise men would say, "Some things are better left unsaid." Just so we can maintain the more stable status quo. In that light, I am announcing that I can't wait for FINALS to be over just so I can be a li'l more normal.

I miss my old jolly self. I've been pretty off these past few weeks. Colleen pointed out that I am abnormally quiet... well it's true. And then she went on to saying that, "He's not just a friend. You talk about him, cry about him and he's changing you. He's not just a friend." Well, partly true, at least on my perspective. He actually IS a friend, nothing more. Although there's that hope of making him something more, which is kind of impossible because we rarely see each other and we never really had potential and well, he's uhmm, not into me. I guess. Just like a majority of the men I have been attracted to, I am just a friend to him. Never the girl friend material... never the woman being chosen. I'm always a spare tire. And that is quite TRAGIC.

Which brings me to my wanting to thank Colleen for treating Patring, Patty and I to a delightful night at UCC. It was worth not studying for. Seriously.

Hmm. I should stop before I end up saying something incriminating.

My Work Here is Done

[habang nagchichikahan ang magkaklase, pumasok ang 1D at nagulantang kami ng isang mala-pickup line na...]

Ana: Excuse me. [demure tone] May class ba kayo ng Saturday?

Di namin kinaya. We know na may logical reason, apparently tina-try nya itanong kung may nakaiwan ng laptop nun Saturday.. .Still. It was a pickup line. At least it sounded like it. Un na. My work here is done. Laughtrip talaga. Alamin ba ang schedule?

Never Outdated

Euns: Beanstalk, malapit na ang birthday natin.
Beanstalk: Ilang taon na ba tayo?
Euns: Ako mag-23 ikaw mag-24... Ang petty parin ng issues natin.
Beanstalk: Ano ka ba... LOVE IS NEVER OUTDATED. It always is a relevant
issue.

Tama.